Dar al-Islam, Part Fourteen: … And On and On

27 Aug
Well okay Haroun (again), let’s get going. And please do not die on me!
I don’t intend to! In fact, I have big plans!


Wait… Let’s read that again. Namely, let’s read your name.

Haroun the first? Did your grandfather not count?

Guess not!

Well sure. Why not? I’m just happy to see another Kalmen leader with the proper ambition in life! Unfortunately, like so many Kalmen before, you have a succession crisis to deal with.



It was inevitable, really. I mean, how many Kalmen Emir’s have died in the last eighteen months?

Four. Four dead Kalmen leaders in a year-and-a-half. That is a lot of claimants left lying around, vying for the throne! Now Ra’uf wants to take a slice of the pie. That slice just happens to be the whole damn thing.

In fact, this is just one big mess of messiness, this is!



A few brief battles and your brothers forces are pushed west. However, he still has a large army marching up and down the Nile, hitting the levies we raise to reinforce our two armies. It’s a massive pain in the ass.

However, your loyal subject Hanri has managed to scrape together an army nearly one thousand strong, and lays siege to Hayya.


With Ra’uf currently in the Nile Delta fighting your troops, Hanri has plenty of time to siege the enemy fortress. It doesn’t take long to capture the city.

Meanwhile, in the Delta, Ra’uf has been captured in battle. He is now your prisoner.

Only one thing to do then.


That does solve the problem, yes. However, I think you have a different, slightly more pressing issue.

What would that be?

You died.

Did I?


Damn! That sucks. Kalmen blood seems to be pretty weak these days.

I agree. Also, stop talking.


Well that’s one succession dispute ended. Time to prepare for the next one!

Hakam! You’d best be ready. You’ve got tonnes of gold. Hire some mercs!


This is bad, isn’t it?

I wouldn’t go that far.

Well, okay. Yes. It’s very bad.

Meanwhile, I have no idea what you’re doing.


I don’t know what Miaphysites even are!

So wait, you’re a Christian now? Well, stranger things have happened. But I have no doubt you are going to lose this war now, as your subjects reject the notion of a Christian Emir of Alexandria. I mean, just look at this war:


Sure, we’re winning (sort of), but your enemies are many and I don’t think you can keep up. They are gaining ground fast, and attrition is on their side. There really is nothing you can do, Hakam. More and more of your lords are joining against you. You’d be best off if you simply White Peace your way out of this war.


Well that’s annoying!

Isn’t it though? To see the beautiful Kalmen Emirate broken apart like that is jsut shameful!


Just don’t let it happen again!

I’ll just save up my strength and declare war to take that land back!

No can do, Hakam! The new Tulunid Sultan, Sharif, has instituted Medium Crown Authority in Egypt. His vassals can no longer declare war on one another.

Then I’ll have to see Crown Authority lowered, won’t I?

Or you could just take the Sultanate itself!

Either one! Or both!


I think you meant ‘bestest Sultan’!

Damn right I did!

NEXT TIME: The Bestest

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Posted by on August 27, 2013 in CK II, Snarkangel Plays (The Tags)


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