Dar al-Islam, Part Eighteen: Manflight

04 Sep
Really? You’re all for murdering a dog, right up until a little girl cries at you?
To be fair, her father is a giant.

You’ve never backed down from a fight in your life. If you thought he was threatening you, you’d have ripped his face from his skull with your bare hands!

Shut up, she was adorable, okay?
When you want something, you go for it! As, it seems, does Suhaila, your teenage daughter.
She is certainly a precocious little one!
Meanwhile, after nearly a decade of war against your vassals in Sicily, the Byzantine Empire has collapsed. Athens, Byzantine Sicily and southern Italy have all broken off, forming the nation-state of Epirus. The Byzentines still exist, holding only a tiny portion of Croatia.
I guess that means both countries are weak…


It most certainly does! Epirus is ripe for the picking.


Holy War for Sicily?


Holy War for Sicily! We can take southern Italy while we’re at it! Before that, however, you should probably know: Caliph Muhammad IV died, and was succeeded by Caliph Shaiban. You should probably make friends with-




Well then. How goes the war?




I got this one in the bag!


Sure looks that way! And in the middle of all this bloodshed, Suhaila has grown up!





And her betrothed (now husband, I suppose) immediately confers upon her a high honour:




Which, funnily enough, was her very first Ambition! She achieved it in mere days. Not bad!


For a woman.


Don’t be such a grump, Hakam. Also:




Unfortunately, since they were in rebellion against the Byzantine Emperor, we didn’t get all of their Italian land.

Also (again):



Go make friends! (again).


Actually, wait.




Yes, that is Hungary in the Middle East. Because the King of Hungary was, at one point, a Samarid ruler, who also owned land in Mesopotamia. Now, that Hungarian Sultan has rebelled and brought with him all sorts of trouble for the Samarids.




Most of the land on the right side of that screenshot was, until only days ago, Samarid territory. Note Bavaria and Lombardy splintering from the Holy Roman Empire. They won’t really be able to take advantage of this moment of Samarid weakness. The Seljuk might though!


Sadly, there are festering denigrates within the Kalmen Sultanate.





I will not be blackmailed!


Let’s hope it’s that easy! Spoiler: It won’t be








Mercenaries won’t be enough, Sultan. After the war against Epirus, and a minor war against the Byzantines, our armies are exhausted. We may not have the muscle to take on all these threats at once.


Most of the disloyal vassals rose in south-central Egypt. The majority of our troops are in the west. Let us focus there, on the easier targets, then return by sail to Alexandria.




That seems to be working! Though the Tunisian Independence movement is falling to our swords, we are losing a lot of ground and will have much catching up to do along the Nile.’








Now we just need to take central Egypt back. They don’t have Alexandria or Fustat, the two most important provinces in Egypt, and that gives us a bastion from which to launch our counterattack. Our army, bolstered by fresh mercenaries and submissive Tunisian Sheikhs, lands at Alexandria and within days marches to meet the enemy army.


Oh, and did I mention we outnumber then by a HUGE amount?





Crisis averted! Now we just need to mop up these disgruntled Crown Authority whiners!




Well never mind! They whine pretty hard!


The war progresses slowly. They have a lot of five-thousand-strong armies wandering around, making hunting them all down a tedious affair. They also have a vast head start as far as siege and occupation goes. However, after a long slog f minor battle and lengthy siege, the war is over.




In the meantime, both the Holy Roman Empire and the Samarid Dynasty have quelled their own fractitious rebellions. Status Quo truly is God.


NEXT TIME: Upsetting the Status Quo


Posted by on September 4, 2013 in CK II, Snarkangel Plays (The Tags)


Tags: , , ,

2 responses to “Dar al-Islam, Part Eighteen: Manflight

  1. Badd

    October 2, 2013 at 7:12 PM

    … Why is Venice owned by pagans?

    • snarkangel

      October 3, 2013 at 1:45 AM

      Damn, good eye!

      I don’t actually remember. But Italy and the Holy Roman Empire have fallen apart and coalesced so many times, I wouldn’t be surprised if a Pagan lord did manage to nab it, if only briefly.


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